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How Do We Stay Out of Ego?

In order to stay in touch with our True Divinity, our Higher Self, we must master our ego. Managing our ego is an exercise of the highest order as a human being. It takes most of us years of growth and practice in order to effectively control our ego. Before I get into how we can master our own ego, let’s talk about what mastering or controlling our own ego really is.

Because practically no one had a perfect childhood, for most of us we are starting in a position of having a wounded ego (often referred to as that wounded inner child) that needs to be healed in some areas. Let me state very clearly here that very few of us, including myself, are capable of healing all facets of that wounded ego that was damaged when we were very young. Some of us carry wounds from previous lifetimes which need to be healed as well. But my point in making these statements is that just because we have many wounds, it does not mean that we are not capable of connecting to our Divinity, our Higher Self. It does mean that there are some areas we should be aware of that our ego will affect what we see or feel when we are connected, and we cannot trust what we see or feel in those areas because we have not healed the wounds of our egos around those areas.

Simply stated, we can trust what we receive from our Divinity when we are not seeking a particular answer. When we earnestly ask to be shown the truth, we will receive the truth when we don’t carry any perception of what the truth is. When we are in a healed place of wanting only the truth, regardless of what the truth is, we are in a place of being out of ego. We have NO attachment to outcome, or attachment to what the answer to our question is.

So now we’ve established what controlling our ego is, how do we get to the place where we are capable of actually detaching from our ego? Healing our childhood wounds is a good place to start. As human beings, we are body, mind, and soul.

We all have 3 aspects of our humanness that need nurturing:

  1. Body or the physical

  2. Mind or the psychological

  3. Soul or the spiritual

I’m not getting into care of our body right now, but let me just say, if we ignore our physical health, the pains we will experience later will affect our emotional and spiritual health, and in reality the health of all 3 facets affects the health of the other 2, but we don’t notice it until something goes awry with one facet.

The healthy functioning of our emotional and our spiritual facets can be intertwined, but the process of healing the emotional facet cannot occur unless it is properly addressed from a human standpoint. In other words, we cannot meditate away our childhood wounds. I will tell you that it is possible to numb ourselves from the pain of the childhood with meditation, but this is not true healing, and as a matter of fact, it is no different than an alcoholic drinking the pain away. We may be numbing the pain, but we are not altering the unhealthy behavior that the wounds cause. Until we seek professional guidance on some level, we aren’t truly healing anything, and behavior that seems “normal” to us, which is actually self destructive, will continue to hold us down.

I’m not suggesting that one needs years of counseling to heal the wounded ego, but starting with counseling to get on the path of healing will expose us to books we can read that will facilitate our healing. We will know we are healed when we look at what caused our wounds, and we have no more or minimal triggering around the events that wounded us, and we have truly forgiven the perpetrators of the events around our wounds because we understand they have those wounds too. We actually can develop a degree of sympathy for those individuals.

Healing our emotional wounds will have a dramatic affect on our life, so much so, that we will wish we had started this journey much earlier than we did. I got way deeper into the need for counseling than I intended to, but I am channeling when I write. Most of what I write is given to me by the Divine, so I go with it with very little editing on my part.

So spiritually, how do we disconnect from ego? The best way that I found to separate myself from ego was to regularly practice meditation, which by the way, I developed my form of meditation many years ago when I was in counseling working on healing my childhood wounds. Meditation puts us in touch with our Divinity, our Higher Self, that brings about a euphoria and calmness to our life that we otherwise would not experience. In addition, being in touch with our Higher Self shows us the Divine piece of ourselves that many of us never knew existed. This awareness of our higher selves brings us to a level of Higher Self Love as well, which in itself is a healing of our ego or wounded inner child. It is through meditation that we actually experience the wisdom and Love of the Divine that goes far beyond what anyone told us in our religious studies. There is no greater teacher than experience. One can talk about meditation all day, but until we actually experience it ourselves, we really have no idea how much it will improve our lives.

Likewise, connection to the Divine and our Higher Selves does not come from reading articles or watching videos. You get that? There are many out there, including myself, that are telling us what to do, but until we actually stop and be quiet and still, we will not be connecting on the level I have been describing.

Meditating daily, even if it’s just 10- 20 minutes a day will bring a calmness and balance to our lives that is almost indescribable. I get up an hour earlier than I once did just to start my day with the quiet calm that meditation brings. It sets the tone for the day for me. That doesn’t mean that there won’t be stressful things coming at me, but what it does mean is that I will be less likely to be triggered by the events, and I can approach these events calmly and rationally, and that means my ego is parked in its safe, happy place. When our ego is parked where there are no triggers to what we feel around the events coming at us, we are, in a healthy way, not in ego at that moment.

Thank you for allowing me to share with you. Love Everybody, especially yourself!!


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